Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Can 'Humiliation' motivate me...


This morning, I was delighted to find myself EARLY (for a change) and was able to buy myself my ONE coffee for the day, along with a healthy bowl of Oatmeal and Berries.  I walked onto the train and sat in my usual spot, only to come face to face with 'Mr. Sour-Pants.'

He scowled at me from the get go and was very sour that I sat down opposite from him (heck, I sit in the same darn seat EVERY morning.)  He scowled even more when two more passengers had to step over his unmoving legs to sit down in our little foursome of seats.

He scowled the whole train ride.  About 5 minutes from our destination, I finished my delicious coffee and went to 'Roll Up the Rim' (I did not win either.)  He then starts squirming around, patting his hands down his coat, looking from left to right, flapping his newspaper.  Finally, he rudely says to me 'Ugh, do you have a napkin, to wipe up the coffee you spilled on my shoe.'  I fumbled around in my pocket and found a napking, wondering if he expected me to wipe his shoe off (and trying to figure how I spilled coffee on his shoe, as it was on my lap the whole time.)

He snatched the napkin from my hand, wiped off his shoe and scowled even more at me.  My face turned BRIGHT red and I was humiliated beyond belief.  This man spoke to me and looked at me like I was a second class citizen.  He had such disdain in his voice and his eyes that it shocked me.

I'm not sure if it was due to my weight or what, but it humiliated me nonetheless and has spurned me on to lose this weight.  I hope one day, he can sit across from me on the train and I can look at him with disgust the way he looked at me.

Now that I've gotten that out of my system (and have stopped seething about it) how am I doing?

Well, I managed to have 2.5 liters of water yesterday, I had ONE coffee at 9:30 last night and avoided my 'before bed' snack (major accomplishment.)  We had spaghetti for dinner last night and while I had a smaller than normal portion, I did find myself picking off the kids plates after I was done.

So...I now know that I need to immediately throw the kids leftovers into the garbage and NOT snack on them after I'm done my meal.

This morning I woke up in a good mood (after a full nights sleep...thank you children!) and was doing really great until Mr. Cranky pants.  But I'm not going to let him spoil my day anymore.

Lunchtime is here...I've already finished 1 liter of water and am working on my 2nd.  I'm planning a sub for lunch (was going to have salad, but feeling like something a little more substantial.)

I'm planning the gym tomorrow at lunch.

And that's it...I will be back later today with my 'Day 1' exercise from my '100 Days of Weight Loss Motivation.'

I can do this, I can do this, I can do this...

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